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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Oct 2013
    Posts
    24

    Default best green horn jokes or story

    who has a good one been welding for twenty years i want to here yours

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Posts
    303

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by 6g 7018 View Post
    who has a good one been welding for twenty years i want to here yours
    A foreman told me I needed to fire a helper because he wasn't worth a flip. I had a fence company and we built all of our own gates etc but the kid needing to be terminated was on an installation crew.

    He was big and dumb, not your first choice to fire. That evening when the crews came in I was working in the gate shop. I called him over to help me out with a frame up. I explained to him that he had to hold the joint tight or he might get shocked so he had better hold it tight.

    He did what I knew he would do, he didn't hold it tight. I had the ground on one side and was hitting the other piece with the stinger. He screamed so I kept tapping it.

    I flipped back the hood cussing him for not holding it like I told him to do. He left, for good without looking back, quit right on the spot, mumbling something about crazy.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Posts
    178

    Default Plasma cutter

    Don't know if this counts, but here we go.
    Couple years ago, I bought a plasma cutter. Love it. I was wanting to cut an angled piece out of a pipe to make a lighthouse. Clamped the pipe down on my catcher barrel, started cutting. Well, it turns out that if you are cutting a pipe, the fire and sparks might shoot out the end instead of falling into the barrel. In fact, they did. It also turns out that those sparks might go into a plastic 5 gallon barrel that has a bunch of kindling in it. In fact, they did. Being a trained, experienced, (30 years on the job) retired firefighter, those flames and smoke sorta caught my attention. Not wanting to use my brand new fire extinguisher, I put a lid on it, took it outside and fought that fire the old school way. Poured water in the bucket.
    As I live only blocks from the fire station I retired out of, I can assure you that I would never ever hear the end of it if those guys ever responded to my house. Well, I learned not to do that...
    Professional firefighter (retired). Amateur everything else I try to do...
    Oh yeah: GO BIG RED!

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    northern NJ
    Posts
    1,840

    Default

    Not welding but back in wood shop class we had a kid cut a board to short for the project. Teacher sent him to the metal shop teacher to get the board stretcher. That teach sent him to another & so on. Finally the kid came back after visiting all the shop classes & said it must be here cause no one else has it.

    Painted a guys clear welding lens with blueing so when he struck an arc he couldn't see anything.

    Sent a kid looking for the left-handed screwdriver once.
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  5. #5

    Default

    Not welding related but it fits. Started in a Glass House when I was just out of High School. Got stuck on night turn as a sweeper in the Hot End. After couple of hours a guy came up to Me and told Me to get the "Mold Stretcher". It was pre hearing protection days and the place was loud, Thought He said Mold Changer, went far away downstairs and found Him sleeping(on His lunch break) He went up to see what was needed and He did not understand it very well. So there 2 fu's off the same mistake.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Location
    South Carolina
    Posts
    570

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by strube1369 View Post
    Don't know if this counts, but here we go.
    Couple years ago, I bought a plasma cutter. Love it. I was wanting to cut an angled piece out of a pipe to make a lighthouse. Clamped the pipe down on my catcher barrel, started cutting. Well, it turns out that if you are cutting a pipe, the fire and sparks might shoot out the end instead of falling into the barrel. In fact, they did. It also turns out that those sparks might go into a plastic 5 gallon barrel that has a bunch of kindling in it. In fact, they did. Being a trained, experienced, (30 years on the job) retired firefighter, those flames and smoke sorta caught my attention. Not wanting to use my brand new fire extinguisher, I put a lid on it, took it outside and fought that fire the old school way. Poured water in the bucket.
    As I live only blocks from the fire station I retired out of, I can assure you that I would never ever hear the end of it if those guys ever responded to my house. Well, I learned not to do that...
    Reminds me of about 12 hours ago, I used some acetone to clean aluminum. Well I had my new leather Tig gloves on and one soaked up some of the acetone.

    This was an edge weld with low heat and I kept thinking my torch hand shouldn't be getting this hot. Finally I had to stop and look and my hand was a blazing.

    I was slinging that glove everywhere to get it off. It burned out quick with no damage. I was thinking how smart that was.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Illinois
    Posts
    597

    Default

    Got a new apprentice ,BIG strong kid. I asked him how strong he is. Gave me a bunch of his stats. Then I asked if he was strong enough to take 10 sticks of 3/32 lo hi , place behind the back of his neck , and bend the rod around it. He did it and then laughed as he tried to shake off the coating that ran down his back.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Posts
    178

    Default

    Occasionally, I forget to wear my leather apron while grinding. This sometimes results in me setting my shirt on fire. Got a bunch of shirts like that now. My wife hates it when I set my clothes on fire while wearing them. Must admit, not real good firefighter behaviour...

    Quote Originally Posted by Hardrock40 View Post
    Reminds me of about 12 hours ago, I used some acetone to clean aluminum. Well I had my new leather Tig gloves on and one soaked up some of the acetone.

    This was an edge weld with low heat and I kept thinking my torch hand shouldn't be getting this hot. Finally I had to stop and look and my hand was a blazing.

    I was slinging that glove everywhere to get it off. It burned out quick with no damage. I was thinking how smart that was.
    Professional firefighter (retired). Amateur everything else I try to do...
    Oh yeah: GO BIG RED!

  9. #9

    Default best green horn jokes or story

    Hey BD1 I love that trick. Whenever the sheeting crew get a man we pull that trick when they stop by the shop. Collared shirts tucked in make for a great flux collector. Some of them will still grab another handful of rods and try to best "said" rod count. Those are also the employees that aren't around for long.

  10. #10

    Default best green horn jokes or story

    Anyone have any other good pranks to try out on fellow employees? I was lucky enough that I was never really pranked when I first came into the workplace.

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